30岁单身怎么改变(三十岁单身的十种养成法)

10 Types of 30-Year-Old Single Guys

30-year-old guys are a curious bunch.

30岁的单身汉是一个有意思的群体

Find me a group of 30-year-old men and I’ll pick out one overgrown frat dude living with roommates, another guy who just dropped his two kids off at school, a few who are well into their careers and a couple soul-searchers looking for work. Some will tell you that they’ve finally figured it all out and some more will say they feel hopeless for the first time in their lives. It’s a motley crew.

通常在一群30岁的男生里,会有一个巨婴,一个能忘记接送他的孩子们,少数开始步入事业的正轨,但是大部分还在寻寻觅觅刚要开始找工作。他们中有些人觉得他们已经拿捏了生活,还有觉得活不明白。这个群体百鸟争鸣。

But perhaps the motliest part of this crowd is the ever-growing group of 30-year-old single guys. If you want a case study in humanity, 30-year-old single guys have pretty much all the bases covered. Let’s examine some of the common types:

但是,比30岁男生更多样的是30岁的单身男生。人类学研究里,30岁的单身男生应该可以涵盖人类类别样本,我们来看看吧。

1) The Total Package

30岁单身怎么改变(三十岁单身的十种养成法)(1)

1) 全能自恋型

The Total Package is smart—he went to a top college. The Total Package is an athlete, a musician, and an avid traveler. The Total Package is handsome—and you better believe he’s well-groomed.

他很聪明:上最好的大学,他们热爱运动,音乐,旅游。长得帅,衣着得体

The Total Package has a hell of a career going, but don’t you for a second suggest that The Total Package would be a workaholic—The Total Package is a family man.

他在拼事业的时候可以全情投入,但同时是个顾家的好男人。

There’s just one thing The Total Package seems to be having a hard time finding—a girl worthy of his greatness.

他很难觅得的只有一样:能配得上他们优秀的女生

Yes, the woman fit for The Total Package will be the ultimate icing on his cake of perfection. He imagines her often—gorgeous as they come, she turns heads; bursting with charm and charisma, she lights up every room she enters; she’s a brilliant rising star in her career and beloved by her many friends. And that’s just her public persona—at home, she’s fantastic in bed, a spectacular cook, loving, selfless, and devoted. Oh and she also speaks French, plays tennis, sings beautifully, reads voraciously and she’s a history buff. His Juliet.

匹配他的女生对完美的他们来说是锦上添花。他经常会想象这样女子的出现:在外,她光满四射的牛过头来,走过之地熠熠生辉,事业上时冉冉之星,很受朋友们的喜爱。在家,她 fantasitic in bed [无辜笑], 她做的一首好饭,充满温柔,无私奉献。另外她还会说法语,打网球,唱歌,阅读涉猎广。这就是他的朱丽叶。

Unsurprisingly, The Total Package is single. He’s immersed in a fierce battle between his superhuman standards and his terror of being 40 and single—because 40 and single is not supposed to be part of The Total Package’s story.

不足为奇,全能型是凭实力单身。他像皮格马利翁一样,沉浸在一个超级高的标准里,想象着那个完美的朱丽叶。一直纠结拧巴,不想降低自己的标准,但又担心40岁了还是找不到,因为40岁还没对象,对他们来说就不完美了。

2) The New Lease On Life Guy

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2) 重振雄风头铁男

As long as anyone can remember, The New Lease On Life Guy had been dating his longterm girlfriend. He never seemed that happy in the relationship, but everyone just assumed they would eventually get married. Now, after a long and difficult breakup, The New Lease On Life Guy has reemerged with a bang and is suddenly acting like he just got called down on The Price Is Right. He’s not really sure how to be single but he’s goddamn happy he is, and he’s sure as hell going out tonight.

这些男人当在一段很长的男女关系中,从来没有真正的快乐,但是周围的人都觉得他能结婚。但是在分手的拉扯痛苦之后,他好像换了个人,开心的像中了的头奖。他一个人过的也很糙,但就是很开心。

He’s also the arch-nemesis of The Resigned Fiance, who’s in an equally unhappy relationship but just kind of kept going with it, unable to resist the sweet, sweet inertia, and who most certainly does not want to hear about The New Lease On Life Guy’s latest exploits.

他是# 前未婚夫# 这部剧男主角的反面。剧里的男主一样觉得在关系里不快乐,但是还是将就,喜欢甜言蜜语,男主看不惯他的作为。

3) The Guy Who Has To Marry Someone Of The Same Ethnicity Or His Parents Will Never Speak To Him Again

30岁单身怎么改变(三十岁单身的十种养成法)(3)

3) 妈宝男

hard enough finding someone to be your life partner, and this guy’s parents are really not making things any easier. He tried to rebel briefly, but after his last girlfriend was not allowed in his parents’ house, causing her to cry, he gave up on that.

He’d also really appreciate it if his mother would stop setting him up on dates.

觉得很难找到人生伴侣?这些男人的父母会对他雪上加霜。他一开始会浅浅的反叛,但是在他最后一个女友痛哭,被他的父母拒之门外。他不再对抗父母

4) The Misogynist

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4) 厌女者

Misogynist hates women, and women hate The Misogynist. The Misogynist doesn’t know a whole lot about the other gender, but he can tell you the exact number of them he’s slept with—214.

他讨厌女人,那么你肯定吸引不来你讨厌的人。他对交往过的女人一点也不了解,但是可以说出他们交往过的精准的数量-214个

He did quite well with girls back in his earlier days when many were in their attracted to assholes phase, but lately, only those with the lowest self-esteem seem to gravitate towards him.

早年间,还是有女生喜欢他,因为那个阶段“男人不坏,女人不爱”。但是,后面只有很低自尊的女生才会被他吸引吧

The Misogynist’s close cousin is The Perpetual Cheater. They’re different but they understand each other.

厌女者的亲戚是 #终极欺骗 # 的男主,他们能够惺惺相惜

5) The Guy Who Peaked Too Early

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5) 大器早成型

in the day, The Guy Who Peaked Too Early had everything a 17-year-old girl could ever dream of. His sky-high confidence carried him smoothly through college, and no one was surprised when he landed a smart, sweet, beautiful girlfriend in his early 20s. But The Guy Who Peaked Too Early was just getting started. There was a field that needed to be played, and he broke up with his girlfriend when he was 24.

这些男人是17女孩的梦中情郎,所以他一直都对自己自信爆棚,到了20岁就拥有一个聪明甜美漂亮的女朋友也是情理之中。但是笑的早,不如笑到最后,对的人出现在错误的时间。他在爱情跑后,抵不过时间,24岁就和女友分手了。

Now it’s seven years later, his hair got bored and left, and his high school lacrosse glory isn’t part of the conversation that much these days. And he’s noticing that girls like his ex-girlfriend don’t seem to be all that into him anymore. Realizing this about five years after everyone else, he takes a deep sigh and cranks his standards down a few big notches.

7年后,头发也离开了他,他不再提起当年的英勇。而且类似他前女友一样的女孩子不再对他感冒。比别人晚五年认识到这点后,他深叹一口气,逐渐减低自己的择偶标准。

6) The Guy Who’s Finally a Good Catch

30岁单身怎么改变(三十岁单身的十种养成法)(6)

6) 又悲又亢型

the other side of the coin, after losing some weight, getting decent clothes, and having early career success, The Guy Who’s Finally a Good Catch is getting more attention each week than he got in his first 25 years combined. Girls find it endearing that such an appealing guy has managed to maintain his humility, when it’s actually just that he’s assuming every girl is out of his league at all times.

因为内心的自卑,利用外表使自己自信。努力减肥后,开始穿着得体,事业也开始大展身手。然后发现他每周都会获得更多的关注比起他过去25年加起来都多,女生会更加沉迷于这些男人,因为觉得他能够保持谦卑。但实际上这类男人无时不刻都觉得没有女生能配得上他们

Once his new situation starts to sink in, he enters an unfortunate new phase, stressing his male friends out by doing things like winking at them over the shoulder of a girl he’s dancing with and offering them a fist pound when an attractive girl walks by on the street.

当他沉迷这种追求的时候,会开始给他的男性朋友们带来苦恼。当他有女朋友的时候,就对他的朋友炫耀,或者有迷人的女孩路过的时候,就给他的朋友一拳展示雄性荷尔蒙。

7) The Normal Guy Who Just Hasn’t Met The Right Girl Yet And He Really Wishes People Would Stop Looking At Him With Those Pitying Eyes

30岁单身怎么改变(三十岁单身的十种养成法)(7)

7) 大树坚守型

Ah, The NGWJHMTRGYAHRWPWSLAHWTPE. The NGWJHMTRGYAHRWPWSLAHWTPE is enjoying his life. He likes his job, he likes his friends, and he likes being single just fine. He’s in no rush to be in a relationship and feels totally confident that at some point, he’ll meet the right girl and get married.

他很享受自己的日子,有喜欢的工作,朋友。他喜欢单身和独处,能够很好的自洽。对于一段关系,有所期待,不急不徐。像一棵大树,知道他们的另一半的小鸟一定会飞来。他们只需要茁壮成长,安静等待

He’s also not quite sure why everyone who knows him is trying to figure out “what the problem is.” His parents are worried, never wasting an opportunity to ask him if he’s been dating anyone. His friends want to help, setting him up on dates every chance they get. He appreciates all the unsolicited support, but he also thinks it would be pretty great if everyone stopped thinking there was something wrong with him.

但是他很烦为什么周围人总是觉得他这么大年纪还是没有女朋友,是不是缺胳膊少腿之类的。他的父母很忧愁,每天叨叨现在是否有开始找女友了。他的朋友也帮他介绍。他很感激所有的帮忙,但是如果大家能觉得他很正常就更好了。

8) The Aggressively Online Dating Guy Who Can’t Believe He’s Not Married Yet

30岁单身怎么改变(三十岁单身的十种养成法)(8)

8) 广撒网 却一无所获型

The opposite of the previous guy, The Aggressively Online Dating Guy Who Can’t Believe He’s Not Married Yet can’t believe he’s not married yet. Through high school, college and his twenties, he was always The Guy With A Girlfriend. He spent years enjoying pitying his single friends, and somehow, he’s now 30 and single.

He has four online dating profiles, and when people ask him if he’s dating anyone, he explains that he’s just too busy with his career right now for a relationship.

和上一种不同,这种类型更像兔子,不断撞桩子。从高中,大学到工作,总是身边女友不断的人。总是挖苦他身边的单身狗朋友。然而,他现在30,也仍是单身。

他有4个交友网站的身份,当人们问到你是否是单身,他解释说,他太忙于工作,没有时间进入一段关系。

9) The In-The-Closet Guy

30岁单身怎么改变(三十岁单身的十种养成法)(9)

9) 没有出柜型

In-The-Closet Guy is so close to being the perfect catch—he’s handsome, he’s well-dressed, and he has a great job. He’s funny, articulate, and charming. The only tiny little inconvenience is that he’s not attracted to females whatsoever.

His antithesis is The NGWJHMTRGYAHRWPWSLAHWTPE, who’s had just enough of the theories about him being gay, since he’s completely straight and, for the hundredth time, just hasn’t met the right girl yet and is really very okay with being single right now.

这种男生接近的女生梦中情郎,他们帅,穿着有品味,工作体面。有趣,健谈,体贴女生。唯一一个没法子的缺点是他们喜欢男人

他的对立面是大树坚守型,很多人会以为大树坚守型是弯的,但是其实他们很直,只是能够一个过的好,还没等到他们想等的人。

10) The Guy Who Has Just Fully Quit At This Point

30岁单身怎么改变(三十岁单身的十种养成法)(10)

10) 安全感缺失而浅尝辄止型

The Guy Who Has Just Fully Quit At This Point never tried that hard in the first place, but at least there used to be a semblance of effort. He doesn’t like going to bars, refuses to try online dating, and both the bong and the X-Box are back in the living room following their brief stint in the closet after his friend gave him a pep talk one day four months ago.

这类男孩不会努力追求一段关系,只是做一些表面的尝试而已,他们不去夜店,没有交友媒体,

Deep down, The Guy Who Has Just Fully Quit At This Point is pretty frightened about a lot of things, but his fear manifests itself in indifferent denial, and passivity usually prevails. There is only one way that things change for The Guy Who Has Just Fully Quit At This Point, and that’s to find himself squarely in the sights of The Girl Who Relentlessly Pursues. Until then, the whole thing isn’t really his issue.

他们害怕很多事情,害怕被拒绝所以消极面对,只有一种情况会让他们在感情中笃定,就是当有一个女孩契而不舍的追求他们的时候,否则他们绝不会全情投入。

你, 是哪一款呢 [可爱]

希望大家的他/她 虽姗姗来迟 却饱含深情 所有的等待 开出果实

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