怼人的英语简单易学（教你如何用英语优雅的）

1. I would ask you how old you are, but I know you can't count that high.

想问你几岁了还这么傻，但我知道你数不了这么大数。

2.Shock me, say something intelligent.

来，吓唬吓唬哥，说点有智商的话。

3. Maybe if you ate some of that makeup, you could be pretty on the inside.

你试试吃点化妆品吧，没准能增加点内在美。

4. If brains were dynamite, you wouldn't have enough to blow your nose.

如果大脑是炸药，别人都能炸上天，可你连炸油条都不够。

5. Ordinarily people live and learn. You just live.

普通人都是活到老学到老。你只做到了前者。

6. They said you were a big asset. I told them they were off by two letters.

人们说你是莎士比亚。我告诉他们，你们多说了俩字。

7. God made coke, God made pepsi.

上帝造了可口，上帝造了百事。

8.I bet your brain feels as good as new, seeing that you’ve never used it.

我猜你的大脑一定是十成新，从来没用过。

9.Go ahead, tell them everything you know. It’ll only take 10 seconds.

赶紧的，快跟大家炫出你所有的知识。

十秒钟应该够了。

10.They say opposites attract. I hope you meet someone who is good-looking, intelligent, and cultured.

人都说互补才有吸引力，我希望你能遇到颜值高、智商高、文化高的伴侣。

11.What a stupid douche bag,he has no clue what he is talking about.

多么愚蠢的家伙，他根本不知道自己在说什么。

12. Somewhere out there, there is a tree, tirelessly producing, oxygen so you can breathe. I think you owe it an apology.

外面有一颗树，没日没夜的制造着氧气，供你可以呼吸。